Focus on your own wellbeing
Our focus for this Season is on ‘Wellbeing & self-care’ and I’m delighted to welcome Sarah Tennant as my guest. Today we’ll be talking about how you can focus on your own wellbeing.
A big thank you to Coach Matters for sponsoring this season. Coach Matters offers recently qualified and experienced coaches the opportunity to expand their business development capabilities, allowing them to reach more clients and lead successful, sustainable coaching careers. Through its programmes and network membership, Coach Matters provides a supportive, confidential learning space in which coaches connect with each other, share ideas, seek solutions and learn from experienced coaches, business owners and trainers. Coach Matters is offering our listeners an exclusive offer of three months’ free membership of its network when you reference this podcast. To find out more, visit coachmatters.co.uk/mcm.
About this episode
Our focus for this season is on wellbeing and self-care and I’ll be talking to some incredible women and experts from around the world to share their real-life stories, advice and tips to help you manage your wellbeing alongside your career.
Today I’m excited to welcome the founder of Coach Matters, Sarah Tennant, as my guest and we’ll be talking about how you can focus on your own wellbeing.
Resources
Sarah Tennant: Connect with Sarah on LinkedIn.
Coach Matters: Coach Matters provides the vital growth roadmap for coaches to thrive both professionally and personally through network membership, business development programmes and wellbeing events. Coach Matters is offering our listeners an exclusive offer of three months’ free membership of its network when you reference this podcast. This gives you access to the network, inclusive participation in group sessions and coaching business development masterclasses plus discounted rates on the Nourish wellbeing event series. There is nothing to pay for three months and you can cancel at any time. To find out more, visit coachmatters.co.uk/mcm.
Coach Matters has also made its business development masterclasses and Nourish wellbeing series available to non-members for a small fee. Upcoming events include:
29 June - Developing your coaching business with systemic maps
6 July – Meditation for coaches
12 July – Confidence masterclass
For more details, visit www.coachmatters.co.uk/events
SLT Executive Coaching: www.sltexecutivecoaching.com
Episode transcript
Joy Burnford: Good morning, Sarah, and welcome to The Confidence Conversation.
Sarah Tennant: Morning Joy. It's lovely to be here.
Joy Burnford: It's great to have you on the podcast. And so the theme for season five, as you know is wellbeing and self care. And today we're going to chat a bit about your background and Coach Matters, the importance of wellbeing and self care, and advice for our listeners in focusing on their wellbeing. So, to kick us off today, I wondered if you could tell me a little bit about your background, how you became a coach and what you do today.
Sarah Tennant: Okay, thank you. Yeah, so I started my career in publishing, and I held international sales and marketing management roles. And from there, I made a transition to the not for profit and art sector, where over 10 years or so I developed a freelance career. And I provided strategic business development, and fundraising consultancy, to a wide range of organisations. And then it was during my second maternity break, that I decided to have some career coaching myself. But I still, you know, I did then make a slight change in the organisations that I was freelancing for. But I then had another break following a family bereavement actually. And this was really an opportunity to really take stock and think about what I really wanted to do. And actually, I did actually have my own light bulb moment, as I was reading an article in The Guardian, about a day in the life of an executive coach, and it happened to be the coach that I'd had. Straightaway, I thought, this is the kind of work I would absolutely love to do. I'd had inklings of this in the past, and I'd already done a counselling course, kind of be years before. But yeah, it really kind of struck me that actually, throughout my career, a thread really was about helping people, helping individuals, recruiting them, training them, managing them and supporting them. And actually, across the many different organisations that I'd worked in as a freelancer that was what I really loved doing was making those connections and helping where I could. So yeah, that led me to, and around the same time, I was also feeling quite frustrated at how challenging it can be for women to navigate their own career changes and to sustain and develop kind of careers around family life.
Joy Burnford: Absolutely. I think I said to you before, I've had exactly the same light bulb moment, actually. And I had a coach when I was sort of, I think it was when I had my second child. And the first time I'd ever come across coaching, and it was so fundamental, and it was instrumental in my kind of change of career as well, because I realised, wow, this is so helpful to kind of help you think about things in a different way and realise you're not on your own. And, and as you know, my mission is to make sure that we can work with organisations to bring in coaches to, you know, everybody at a lower level than just sort of exec level because I think it's, it's so important, and it can be so helpful can't it for, you know, for anybody who can be fortunate enough to have a coach.
Sarah Tennant: I agree with you wholeheartedly. And, you know, the idea that through these coaching conversations, people can feel really confident or become really confident and make changes where they need to, maybe a career change or, you know, kind of have some tools and be equipped to sort of sustain work, home life and move forward. So yeah, so now I work with, mainly with women, and sort of before, during, and after maternity leave, lots of teachers as well as working on parental leave coaching programmes, delivering one to ones and workshops, and I also am a coaching supervisor as well. So I do some coaching supervision. But latterly over the past six months or so, there's been a real shift, and most of my time now is spent on building Coach Matters, which is a business development for coaches. And again, I know we'll go on to talk about this in more detail but I realised the thread there is to help coaches develop careers at a point which can be quite difficult for them to manage as well. So it's very much a thread that kind of runs through where I am now
Joy Burnford: And having, you know as you say coaches help other people and often they're the ones who, you know where do they get their help from so I think you're doing such a fantastic thing with Coach Matters and being that support for coaches to help with you know, when you're running a business as well, a lot of coaches are great at doing the coaching but actually they don't know how to get more business or you know, looking after themselves or you know, all of those things which you're you're doing now with Coach Matters, which is which is fantastic. Do you want to tell me a little bit about Coach Matters now, about what Coach Matters does and and how you help people?
Sarah Tennant: Yeah, well, it's exactly as you say Joy, we're there to help coaches with specific skills training that might be sales and marketing. But equally, it could be just through having some coaching, some mentoring from experienced associates of ours within the coaching sector, all with very varied backgrounds and different skills and things to offer. And also, you know, we run business development, masterclasses, workshops, and also we provide an online community where they, where coaches can connect with each other, and lots of online resources, tools and the like. And really, at the heart of this as well, is the idea that when we remain connected with others, because it can be quite isolating as a coach, and, as you pointed out, you know, you're helping others as well. And we need to resource ourselves. We also provide access to supervisors as well, because we see that as absolutely key for coaches, and their clients. But also, we just feel that by connecting with each other regularly, learning from each other, seeking support, finding solutions, bouncing ideas off each other, this really helps them sustain and develop their careers. And then at the heart of that is our Nourish programme, which enables coaches just to drop in into a yoga session or a meditation, mindfulness session, those kinds of things.
Joy Burnford: And I'm delighted to be running a confidence session for you in a few weeks time, which I'm really excited about.
Sarah Tennant: We're really looking forward to that. And it's that kind of thing that we know, coaches often are doing this work with others, but very rarely get the opportunity to have that work done for themselves. So we're really looking forward to that, in particular.
Joy Burnford: Fantastic. So as you know, the theme is, wellbeing and self care for this podcast season. So I'd love to know if you can tell me a bit about what wellbeing means to you.
Sarah Tennant: It's become much more important over the years for me, actually, I'd say more recently, particularly so. And I think that's true of a lot of my friends and a lot of my peers as well. I think there were always things that I was, yeah, perhaps unconsciously doing, such as moving out of London to the countryside. So that was something that I kind of particularly wanted to do, getting a dog, becoming freelance as well, because I did that as a way to sort of try and manage my own wellbeing. So there were all things like that, but I'm not sure the language was necessarily there in the same way. But over time, it's become really clear to me that it's really important to have several things in the mix. And I really like to see things as a whole. So looking at work life, perhaps, to draw on a well known coaching tool, called the 'Wheel of Life to' see wellbeing as containing different elements that holistically address our physical, mental, and emotional wellbeing and states. So in there for me at the moment, there's some yoga, I'm a beginner, but I love it. There's some mindfulness meditation practice, there's podcasts with Tara Brach, this is not every day, by the way. And then just things for pleasure. So over the course of a week, or a month, you know, am I going for enough walks, or sometimes not. In nature, you know, classical music is something I need every day anyway. But, you know, it's kind of working out what you need in that toolkit, if you like, or in that wheel. They do change over time for me, but at the moment, there's things the things that I've mentioned and reading and that type of thing, connecting with family and friends. Harvesting and cooking with the veg that Richard grows in the garden.
Joy Burnford: Amazing. Yeah, and I think you know, you're right. And things like I find when I go for walks and things, I find it really hard to leave my phone at home sometimes because I often find that I'm busy. And I'm like, oh, I'll just whilst I'm walking, I'll just speak to somebody, and I'll just do something on my phone. And I kind of kick myself every time I do that. I think I should just leave my phone at home and go for a walk and enjoy nature. Because otherwise you just don't get that break which is really important, isn't it?
Sarah Tennant: I think so. And I think it can be really hard as well to do that. So I think, you know, go to the things that you really love first and then I think that can build some momentum.
Joy Burnford: Yeah, that's a great point. So as we've talked about, part of what you do is helping people to balance their career development with family life. So what are your thoughts about juggling that work and home life and you think it's hard to get that balance, right?
Sarah Tennant: Yeah, in my in my mind, there's no doubt that it's challenging and all stages from that initial surprise, shock, that big transition when you first start a family and you're trying to juggle work and family life. And then even you know, as the children grow as well, they need you in different ways. So I think it's an ongoing challenge. And one of the things that I think is really important is that we have really honest conversations at home, as well as in the workplace, but that we have them at home. And we look at what I think of as their home, work life contract, if you like. And I think we need to be aware, you know, as a partnership, as a team, whoever's in that team, and that can be other sources of support outside the home. But what are the overall jobs and tasks and responsibilities that we need to manage our work and family life, and who's responsible for what and you know, we need to make sure that we communicate, ongoing check in, because things we often kind of jokingly calling it call it re contracting. And often that happens when we realise we haven't been paying attention to it for a while. But it's really simple, you get back on track, and you realise you need to shift a few things.
Joy Burnford: Absolutely. And one of the things I talk about, you've probably heard me talking about before is the sort of end to end tasks. And there's a book by Eve Rodsky, which is really interesting. And she talks about sort of having the owning, complete end to end tasks. I know as a female, often we, and I know this happens for some men as well. But you know, having that mental load, and that kind of all the stuff that's in your head that you've got to manage. And she talks about having these end to end tasks. And so for example, my husband, he manages the whole kind of football, everything to do with football or sport with the kids. So I don't get involved. I mean, I'm sort of on the WhatsApp group and stuff. But he arranges everything from taking them to the rehearsals, but I don't mean rehearsals, you know, what I mean, matches and practices and all those sorts of things. Which is really, really helpful. Because then you don't, you can sort of really just take away that whole task like you would at work, it's exactly the same. And there's much more awareness now in the workplace about mental health and wellbeing. And terms like overwhelm and burnout are sadly commonplace. Why do you think overwhelm is now more prevalent?
Sarah Tennant: Well, firstly, I do think there is more awareness of this. And we have developed and got used to a language around wellbeing, which I think is brilliant. And I think that was really highlighted, exacerbated, highlighted, drawn out through the pandemic. And equally, I do think it's about our perception of time and often unrealistic demands and expectations that we place perhaps on ourselves, and that some organisations place on us. And there isn't an infinite amount of time as, we know, but lots of us, you know, kind of are striving to do well at home and to do well, at work. And it can be it can be a real squeeze. And I think that's what often can lead to this. And often a feeling I work with people where they're often talking about a feeling of failing at home, and failing at work. And we know that there are many organisations that are trying to address this. And some have been for quite a while. But I think as well, you know, that's where I really believe in that power of coaching workshops, kind of organisational support, so that people can step outside and shift the lens slightly, perspective and get support and get help before you know before overwhelm really takes hold.
*** Joy Burnford: I really hope you’re enjoying the conversation so far. I want to take a moment to tell you a little bit more about my reasons for doing this podcast. My mission is to work together to navigate a path to gender equality. I’m passionate about enabling every woman to have the confidence to progress in their career, and I love talking to, and sharing women’s stories to inspire others. This podcast forms a small part of what we do, and if you think there’s room for improvement in the way your organisation understands and manages the obstacles that women face in the workplace, please get in touch or tell your HR contact about us.
And don’t forget, Coach Matters is offering you 3 month’s free membership of its network when you reference this podcast. Their business development masterclasses and their series of wellbeing events are also now available to non-members. See Coach Matters to find out more. ***
Joy Burnford: Absolutely. And I think you know, talking about coaching, it's interesting to know, why do coaches or others with, you know, HR, mental health or caring responsibilities or those that are in helping professions? Why do they need to focus on their own well being?
Sarah Tennant: I think it can be quite common, actually, for people in helping professions, as you say, to actually neglect their own. And, you know, you see, I see that through GP friends as well and kind of right across the spectrum. And, yeah, I think it's often a mission, very much on purpose, kind of a drive to help others. And with all that we've been talking about as well as family life and work life, it can be really hard to look after yourself. And I think with coaches as well, what really struck me when I changed career was that this is a big career transition for coaches often too, they're often coming to it later on in life. And they're often being freelance and setting up on their own and then potentially running a business for the first time as well. So, as well as not necessarily having the right tools or the right skills. It's all about looking after yourself in the process as well so that you have that balance, so that you're nurturing yourself as well as your clients. That's what really kind of inspired, inspired me to set up Coach Matters.
Joy Burnford: We talked a little bit at the beginning about Coach Matters, is there anything else that you wanted to talk about in terms of how you help your members focusing on their wellbeing?
Sarah Tennant: I think it's largely through that connection. So connection with other coaches, and also coaches from different backgrounds. And people who've done what I've loved about kind of our work with coaches so far is the variety of coaches that are out there. And also how many, how the coaching training courses differ as well. So it's such a rich market, it's such a kind of interesting space in which to work. And so really giving them that connections, skills, opportunity for some coaching and mentoring themselves. And also, you know, talk about your confidence class, having the opportunity to have work done for them, as well as them kind of doing doing work for others.
Joy Burnford: Absolutely. And do you have any other sort of practical tips, I love it on this podcast, if people can come up with some practical tips that you can take away, you know, anybody can take away today, and we've talked a lot about women, but it's not just women, it's anybody. And mental health is a massive thing for both men and women, and other genders. And I think it's you know, any practical tips that you can give us about how to make time for themselves, and you know, prioritising self care and fitting it into their working lives.
Sarah Tennant: Yeah, I think picking up again on the work life home contract, and then having that with yourself, as well as kind of people that you kind of share things with. And then I would say, thinking of that whole of work and life thinking perhaps of that wheel, if that's something that suits you, it might be a checklist, or your toolkit, however you prefer to see it. And really spending some time thinking about what needs to be in there right now. And maybe starting with those things that you do love. So for me at the moment, yoga is easier than an aerobic class. And just working out what it is, you know, and spending that time as you would with your clients, what needs to be in there. And you know, the actual coaching, exercise gets you to rate where you currently are on that strand, or that spoke of the wheel, for example, on a scale of one to 10. And perhaps that's a useful thing to do. Some people might like that exercise, where it's like, where it is now and where you'd like it to be. But also be kind to yourself in that process. Know that things will fluctuate, we evolve, our coaching evolves, the market around us, global pandemic evolves. So we do need to be quite flexible and agile, and yet consistent. But I think that's about supporting self awareness.
Joy Burnford: And I'd love your opinion on this. Because I think there's sort of two ways. I fit a lot into my life. And I have a family and I work and do various things in my career and home life. And the way I make it all fit is by doing things like when I go to the hairdresser's I perhaps might take a book to read that's related to something I'm doing or I might have my nails done whilst I'm listening to a podcast, or I might do I kind of fit things in around. And sometimes I think that's a great use of time, because I'm actually making sure I am filling up my bucket with things that I enjoy. But then sometimes I think, am I trying, am I not creating that boundary between just enjoying having my hair done, and having that sort of time without thinking about work? So it's a real balance, isn't it? It's actually not because I always say, I think you should just be able to do when you're working for a corporate or anything, you should be able to do your work when you feel like doing it. As long as it's going to benefit the client and your team and everything else. It's about fitting that, fitting life and work together in a way that suits you. Because then you're going to feel more fulfilled at the end of the day. And obviously, sometimes you feel like you really need to go for a walk without your phone. And that's great. But equally, sometimes you think I really need my hair cutting and the only way I can get my hair cut is by doing a bit of work whilst having my haircut. So I'd love your views on what you think about that.
Sarah Tennant: I think you've hit the nail on the head. It's about working out as you go along often. Some people definitely prefer some hard and fast rules. But for me, and especially I think when you're running your own business, as well, perhaps, one of the drivers for that often is to have a little bit more work life balance, if you like. But for me, it's about being mindful about it, being aware of it and asking yourself some questions. And taking stock of that and then reflecting, you know, maybe putting a bit of reflection time in each week to think what's going well, what's not going so well. And where am i doing something just for me?
Joy Burnford: I always remember being given the advice that if you sort of arrive somewhere in a car, rather than just arriving, jumping out the car, just take a moment before you get out of the car to just think and I think that was a really nice sort of, you know, if you can sort of get things into a habit like that. I think that was a really useful piece of advice that I was given.
Sarah Tennant: I think actually by making sure that we're paying attention to all aspects of our wellbeing as well. So thinking of it that in that way, what I am doing, say for my mental health, or that, or intellectual kind of health, and physical, and you know, nourishment, and also kind of, when I say spiritual, that could mean all sorts of things that could be classical music, walking in nature, whatever it is. So I think thinking of things in that kind of sense, and keeping a check on things. I think that's, that's kind of key.
Joy Burnford: Yes. And I think having a coach, for example, is a great way of keeping you accountable to that as well. So it's, you could say, I've got all these great intentions, and then you forget to do it. And I think having, even a friend, telling a friend, what you want to do, and actually asking them to keep you accountable. Fantastic. So thank you so much, Sarah. It's been a real pleasure to have you on the podcast. And thank you to Coach Matters for your support as well in this podcast season. And if anybody wants to find out more about you and your work, where can they go?
Sarah Tennant: Well, yes, thank you Joy. It's been an absolute pleasure. And a lovely, lovely kind of moment in the day as well to talk about wellbeing. Yes, people can find me on LinkedIn. So Sarah Tennant on LinkedIn, we also have a website, www.coachmatters.co.uk, and I also have a coaching website, which is www.sltexecutivecoaching.com. And actually from either of those websites, you can book a call with me, or just send me a message via LinkedIn. I'd be delighted to connect.
Joy Burnford: Brilliant. Did you want to mention the Coach Matters three months free access?
Sarah Tennant: And what we're offering, alongside sponsoring or supporting and supporting you through this podcast series, is three months free access for any coaches that would like to just try and see what we're all about at Coach Matters. And we've done three month also bearing in mind that August is coming out, and that's one of our life, work balance things, we won't be delivering kind of sessions in August, but they'll still be many resources and what have you. But so you know, kind of do do get in touch, follow the links that will be in the show notes.
Joy Burnford: Fantastic. Thank you so much. It's been a pleasure. And I look forward to talking to you again soon.
Sarah Tennant: Thanks, Joy. Bye bye.
Joy Burnford: And that’s it for this week. Thank you very much for listening and I’ll be back again soon with another Confidence Conversation. If you know anyone who might find this podcast useful, please do pass on the link and it would give me a real confidence boost if you could subscribe, rate and leave a written review (on Apple podcasts here or on Podchaser here). If you like what you’ve heard, sign up for updates where I’ll be sharing tips and notes from each episode and you can send in your ideas for future topics.
And remember you can get 3 months free membership of Coach Matters Network when you reference this podcast. To book, get in touch at coachmatters.co.uk/mcm.
Thank you, and until the next time, bye for now.